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Friday, June 08, 2007

12:29 PM


i maybe there for you.always and forever.but i feel tired.
i'm tired of reading ur blogs.reading those words that make me dizzy,trying to feel how you feel.it's always me?has it?it always was.i always feel i was the one to blame.but blaming myself,i feel tired,tired of looking those things you gave me that went missing.tired of wondering what's gonna come next.tired of telling and begging you to study.tired of you putiing the blame on me.tired of being friends with you.i feel so tired.u wanna know what i'm thinking ? ok.let me tell you what i'm thinking!

i hate the way u're always be with me.i always wonder why the anger?why the feelings?why?i dont understand.but maybe it's because of me.we dont have same thoughts.u may hate that guy a lot,but i maybe loving that guy to hell.u dont know how i feel and i dont know what u're thinking.i always wonder why do you always treat me this way?i know it.because you appreciate our friendship.you always have.i keep on persuading myself that it's because you treat me as your life long best and ever friend.and i'm really proud of that!i really am!but have you ever thought of me?i keep on doing these silly mistakes,i blame myself,i read ur thoughts,by what?by your blog.and those posts are always about me.how i disappoint you.i always have.and i know that you want to give up being as my best friend.i know you want to let it go.

i am angry.angry angry angry.angry about how deeply i disappoint you.sometimes you even take concern about really really small matters.matters that dont matter at all.but i know you take them as a huge concern.but for me?have you ever thought how those matters are to me?they dont matter at all for me.i'm tired.i dont wana keep accepting the blame.it feels bad, really really bad.

and do you wany to know why i'm such eager to leave for japan?it's because i can't stand it anymore.i want to have a new start , a new life.i want to run away from those problems.
but what can i do ?i'm just being myself.i dont appreciate things.i dont know why?i just dont.I DONT!!!!!


me.myself

• 17 year old femme • I love my world • I ♥LOVE♥ chocolates • I'm addicted to One Tree Hill • I love to read • I have a weird fascination with books • All my clothes don't have tags on them (except one which i just bought) • I'm a book freak...have too much, but still not enough • I love exercising • I'm a woman (Virgo, that is) • I'm tired of friends • I don't like tunderstorms • I have brown eyes • I have 6 hamsters (hell knows what their names are since they're dead now) • I want to go to Japan more than anything • I'm obsessed with books (no joke) • I love my family • I hate being occupied with thoughts • I would die without food


contact >> ♥ me ♥

my.music

  • Howie Day > Collide
  • Fall Out Boy > Sugar, We're Going Down
  • Marjorie Fair > Empty Room
  • Jimmie Eat World > Here You Me
  • La Rocca > Non Believer
  • Nelly Furtado > Say It Right
  • All American Rejects > Move Along
  • Rihanna > Unfaithful
  • Dashboard Confessional > Currents

    my.mood

    my.expressions

    my.visits

    Blogger
    Blogskins
    MySpace

    my.past

    November 2006 l December 2006 l January 2007 l February 2007 l June 2007 l

    my.gossip

    Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone, and do not be troubled about the future, for it has yet to come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering.

    layout

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